just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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