I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
