I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
