How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
