So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Small penises have feelings too.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
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