In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize