just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
i dont even know how to be here
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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