remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize