she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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