But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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