ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
