I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
