Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
