There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
