god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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