used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
