i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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