so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
