white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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