He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
