I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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