she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
