how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
