So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
