I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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