so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
