fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
