I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
