Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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