Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
