Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
