I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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