never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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