Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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