then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
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