OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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