im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
