i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize
