Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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