I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
