sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Randomize