They should really pass out barf bags in church
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
