I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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