she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
