GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
