I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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