She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I have aggressive nipples.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Randomize
