Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Randomize
