Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
