it's not cheating when I paid for it
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
